The gold wedding band

Annette Cardoza
3 min readApr 5, 2022

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I recently had a conversation with my son Seth.

When My husband went home to be with the Lord, he left behind his beloved gold band that he had handcrafted for our marriage of June 11, 1983.

He had a friend from high school back in Visalia make it. I remember Ken saying that this friend had become a very talented jewelry maker and he was glad that his friend would be making his wedding ring for him.

Ken really wanted to design his own wedding band. I remember it as if it were yesterday just how excited Ken was to draw out the design. He was an exquisite artist and quite the painter. His passion was pen and ink drawings.

It had been a few weeks that Ken had worked on crafting the drawing for his band. The symbols on it are the living water, the cross, an ichthus fish, eternity bands and finally the tree of life (the one he always talked about and looked so forward to seeing someday in heaven).

This ring meant a lot to him. He rarely took it off. It was incredibly sad after 38 years to take it from the finger on his left hand as he lay quiet and still shortly after departing from the earth.

I so wanted to just leave it on his finger, but I knew what he wanted. And I knew what he would say, “I’m not here anymore, I have no use for silver or gold.”

Three days before he departed, our son and his fiancé Danica had decided to be married with Ken present as he sat right up in the front in a wheelchair with his oxygen on. It was a lovely day in our courtyard and he was right up near the bride and groom.

A couple days after he went to heaven, I knew he would have wanted Seth to wear his ring. In fact, Seth had recently lost his own ring while swimming in a river in Austin just weeks before.

So of course, It all made sense.

Seth tried it on but it was slightly too tight. When I took it to have it sized up a notch, the jeweler said it would be a shame to cut it because of it’s intricate hand made carvings in the gold.

Seth had the option to wear it on a gold chain around his neck. As I continued to wear it, ironically it fit my left finger perfectly (I suppose time changes our sizes, yikes).

I knew of course it would be just a matter of time that Seth would find the perfect gold chain to wear with the ring around his neck.

It made me happy to know he would eventually be wearing his dads small sweet treasure.

At one point, while it was still with the jeweler being evaluated, I was without it on my finger for a week or so.

As strange as it sounds, my hand knew it was gone and I felt lonely without it.

It has stayed on my finger ever since and brings me so much joy.

I recently talked to Seth about it and what he said filled my heart up to the brim!

I asked him what he thought if I wear dads ring maybe even for the rest of my life here on earth. And then whenever I am cremated he can have it?

His response to me, “Keep wearing it even then.” In other words, wear it into heaven.

My response to him is the same one Ken had for me.

I said, since I won’t be here anymore, I would want him to have the same sweet memories that dad and I both had wearing it.

It has some pretty special meaning all over it. In fact, the message it carries has always been meant to be a message for those still living.

All the meaning for us that it carries will already be living out in heaven.

Perhaps Seth will eventually pass it on-down the line.

However, having said all of that. If something were to happen to this ring (and now it’s starting to feel like ‘the precious’ in Lord of the rings, but not really).

Seriously though, if it were ever to be Lost, stolen or crushed. It is after all just a thing, an inanimate object. Nothing can ever replace the message on it. It’s always about the soul. The soul is what should never be lost, stolen or crushed especially when we know and love Jesus.

Rings, like anything else are just a reminder of the message that carry’s them.

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Annette Cardoza

I was a hospice nurse and transitioning into procuring plants. I no longer care for the sick. I’m now taking care of me. Learning to live amongst the living.